[Still no sign of the latest missive, so here's another story. It's fiction this time, but the facts about Maura are all true. This should help anyone who wonders what my reference to The Nation Of Palestine was all about. Though neither I nor my grandmother actually needs money from Maura, we both wonder what it is she does with her salary.]
Special Agent Bob Burlington hated two things in life more than anything; rush hour traffic, and breaking in rookies.
On this morning, he had a taste of both.
“Em, excuse me, sir?”
“What?”
“Eh, I was-er, told to report to your office?”
“Listen, whoever you are, I’ve had a really bad morning up to now, in which sitting in my car NOT moving on the freeway for half an hour was the highlight. Please, PLEASE, let me have this coffee and sit at my desk swearing to myself for half an hour, and I promise I will do whatever you want then.”
“Er, ok, sir”
“Thank you.”
Not only did this give him a chance to have the coffee and curse, it also allowed him to see who the hell this kid was. Shit, I was afraid of that, he thought as he looked through his in-tray sipping his Colombian Hazelnut. It’s a goddam rookie. Agent Bill Fantini? All I need today is a spotty wop firing questions at me. Verdict : have him scouring the internet all day, that oughta keep him out of harm’s way.
An hour later….
“So you check and see who’s visited all these flagged sites on a regular basis, and cross-reference it with our database, ok? Most of them will be known to us, but I want you to spend all day checking if there is anyone new looking at these sites and let me know about them. That clear to ya, kid?”
“Yes, sir!”
“Oh, and kid”
“Yes, sir?”
“Don’t come near me until tomorrow ok? Have a list of names ready for my desk in the morning!”
“Em, sir?”
“What?”
“Would, er- that be the same time I went in first, or, er- when you told me to come back in half an hour, sir……”
“Just peek through the window and look at my face in the morning and you will have your answer.”
Agent Fantini waited an hour after seeing Burlington’s face the next morning.
“Ah, it’s the new kid, what do you want?” was his response to the knock.
“Good morning sir, I, er, have a name here that doesn’t appear…”
“Come in, come in, for God’s sake, don’t just stand at the door, close it behind you, come on!”
“Ah, yes, sir, sorry, sir.”
“And cut the sir shit will you it’s Bob ok? Well, in here – if the chief’s around you gotta do the whole Special Agent Burlington thing, though to be honest I never who the fuck that is!!!”
“Ok, sir, I mean, Bob, sir…”
“Ok, ok, what you got?”
“Well, most of the terminals that were looking at the flagged sites you gave me were from people already on your files…..”
“And…?”
“Well, I thought this one here was interesting.”, and he handed Bob the printout.
“Maura Lee?”
“Yes, she’s a PA at a pharmaceutical firm in South San Francisco, with a home address near Union Square.”
“And she’s been hitting these sites on a regular basis?”
“The Palestinian ones, yes, sir-er-Bob…on a daily basis.”
“Ok, you know what you do now, pull her credit card details, I want to know where she shops, where she eats, and who she’s sleeping with!”
“I, er, started to do that already, sir…that is why I thought you may find this interesting. She doesn’t have a credit card, she pays for everything by cash. There are daily draws on her ATM, and every month she exhausts all of her paycheck down to zero.”
“Zero, eh?” Bob said, staring at the name, now leaning back in his chair. “looks like you’ve done good here, kid! Got any more leads?”
“Er, yes, we found out that every year she goes on vacation.”
“Don’t tell me, she goes to Jerusalem?”
“No, sir, Ireland.”
Eyebrows shot upwards. “Ireland, eh?”
“Yes, I have contacted Homeland Security to try and find out where she stays.”
“So here we have a….[checks the file]….56 year old woman, obsessed with the Palestine situation, who goes out of her way to hide what she does with her money, and every year, you say? [Bill nods] every year, she travels to Ireland. Sound suspect to you, Fantini?”
“I think so, Bob!”
“Ok, me too, not bad work for a rookie! Set up a new file on her, and add in everything you know about where she stays over there and who it’s with. The girls will help you put together the file.”
“Yes, sir!”
“Now get outta my office and let me finish this coffee!”
On this morning, he had a taste of both.
“Em, excuse me, sir?”
“What?”
“Eh, I was-er, told to report to your office?”
“Listen, whoever you are, I’ve had a really bad morning up to now, in which sitting in my car NOT moving on the freeway for half an hour was the highlight. Please, PLEASE, let me have this coffee and sit at my desk swearing to myself for half an hour, and I promise I will do whatever you want then.”
“Er, ok, sir”
“Thank you.”
Not only did this give him a chance to have the coffee and curse, it also allowed him to see who the hell this kid was. Shit, I was afraid of that, he thought as he looked through his in-tray sipping his Colombian Hazelnut. It’s a goddam rookie. Agent Bill Fantini? All I need today is a spotty wop firing questions at me. Verdict : have him scouring the internet all day, that oughta keep him out of harm’s way.
An hour later….
“So you check and see who’s visited all these flagged sites on a regular basis, and cross-reference it with our database, ok? Most of them will be known to us, but I want you to spend all day checking if there is anyone new looking at these sites and let me know about them. That clear to ya, kid?”
“Yes, sir!”
“Oh, and kid”
“Yes, sir?”
“Don’t come near me until tomorrow ok? Have a list of names ready for my desk in the morning!”
“Em, sir?”
“What?”
“Would, er- that be the same time I went in first, or, er- when you told me to come back in half an hour, sir……”
“Just peek through the window and look at my face in the morning and you will have your answer.”
Agent Fantini waited an hour after seeing Burlington’s face the next morning.
“Ah, it’s the new kid, what do you want?” was his response to the knock.
“Good morning sir, I, er, have a name here that doesn’t appear…”
“Come in, come in, for God’s sake, don’t just stand at the door, close it behind you, come on!”
“Ah, yes, sir, sorry, sir.”
“And cut the sir shit will you it’s Bob ok? Well, in here – if the chief’s around you gotta do the whole Special Agent Burlington thing, though to be honest I never who the fuck that is!!!”
“Ok, sir, I mean, Bob, sir…”
“Ok, ok, what you got?”
“Well, most of the terminals that were looking at the flagged sites you gave me were from people already on your files…..”
“And…?”
“Well, I thought this one here was interesting.”, and he handed Bob the printout.
“Maura Lee?”
“Yes, she’s a PA at a pharmaceutical firm in South San Francisco, with a home address near Union Square.”
“And she’s been hitting these sites on a regular basis?”
“The Palestinian ones, yes, sir-er-Bob…on a daily basis.”
“Ok, you know what you do now, pull her credit card details, I want to know where she shops, where she eats, and who she’s sleeping with!”
“I, er, started to do that already, sir…that is why I thought you may find this interesting. She doesn’t have a credit card, she pays for everything by cash. There are daily draws on her ATM, and every month she exhausts all of her paycheck down to zero.”
“Zero, eh?” Bob said, staring at the name, now leaning back in his chair. “looks like you’ve done good here, kid! Got any more leads?”
“Er, yes, we found out that every year she goes on vacation.”
“Don’t tell me, she goes to Jerusalem?”
“No, sir, Ireland.”
Eyebrows shot upwards. “Ireland, eh?”
“Yes, I have contacted Homeland Security to try and find out where she stays.”
“So here we have a….[checks the file]….56 year old woman, obsessed with the Palestine situation, who goes out of her way to hide what she does with her money, and every year, you say? [Bill nods] every year, she travels to Ireland. Sound suspect to you, Fantini?”
“I think so, Bob!”
“Ok, me too, not bad work for a rookie! Set up a new file on her, and add in everything you know about where she stays over there and who it’s with. The girls will help you put together the file.”
“Yes, sir!”
“Now get outta my office and let me finish this coffee!”
